I’m finally getting around to taking down the tree this weekend. There’s a fake one in my household because I can’t bear to think of chopping down a real one just as holiday decoration. Sure, they’re grown on tree farms and another will be planted in its place, but do you know how long it will take for that little sapling to grow into a mature tree? At least seven years! Considering trees can live hundreds of years, seven makes it an infant. Babies are being killed people!
I had forgotten about all the candy canes I bought, and all the ones that were given me so now there’s a big pile I don’t know what to do with. One can only put so many into a mug of hot chocolate. I think after a few maybe my farts would start smelling minty. Candy cane makers should really market that. I’ve see commercials where a guy pops in a minty piece of gum and suddenly everyone around him starts dancing or the Orbit ones that claim to clean a dirty mouth. Who wouldn’t want candy cane butt? Your colon will feel fresher and a no one would mind a minty afterthought.